When people treat the ghost differently to the previous you.

I’m so so fed up with how so called “Friends” have behaved over the last few years.

Not so much those who can’t handle my “Spoonieness” but those I supported through their own challenges before I faced my own.

I very rarely  get angry about things like this – but sometimes I am aghast at how people behave.

Particularly people I know and who I have considered friends, who have wanted to progress in the world of media… 

People I’ve supported over many years, even when others havent – including introducing them to contacts, providing references for jobs in media, creating opportunities and sometimes even promoting and acting as a PR/Media co for free to support them while they move through the sometimes very difficult world they wished to inhabit.

But since my illness struck (or as I’ve been writing this, I’m wondering if it’s as their career has started to rise) calls stopped coming (after daily conversations) , promised recompense for years of unpaid support / work hasnt happened, in fact it’s as if I’ve disappeared. 

Truly ghosted in every sense of the word. 

It’s painful but I can’t let it get to me. 

However I know from conversations I am not the only person to notice it, the “circle” i travel in has!

 After all- to go from daily conversations, being known as the person supporting this up coming talent for years ( in fact over a decade) to being seen to be absent from their social Media, their events, their life… is glaring!

I’m putting this down to my illness as even though it’s shite, its a million times better than the other possibility. 

So this evening- my illness is the lesser of 2 rather harsh, sad, depressing evils.


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