Last night was a full on battle with headache, leg cramps, back pain and overall insomnia.. which allowed me a broken 2-3 hours sleep. 

I laid in my room as the day broke, Feeling sad and exhausted; and I was still laying there 3 hours later… crunching as I moved..

I finally managed to crawl off of the bed at about 10.20am. After a call from my Dr asking me to come in today as I’ve missed some appointments… ( I knew I had missed them, but she asks the questions that make me evaluate and think about my real life, which is something I avoid… She makes me realise I’m frail and sad & a bloody good actress, so yes I have avoided appointments). 

So here I am 11.40am at the Drs. 

Fatter, sadder, iller than I was last time I saw her… BUT a very much more accomplished actress – to everyone outside- I’m doing great..

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